Build-A-Burger
From Free Talk Live
Build-A-Burger is a popular fast food restaurant and the main fundraising mechanism of the vast Jewish International Baker One World Government conspiracy under the umbrella company Build-A-Burger International Ltd Inc LLC (NYSE:NWO). The CEO is a Rothschild.
They are well known by their easily recognizable slogan "Have It Our Way...Or Else!", the jingle of the same name, sung by Owlex Jones, and the Masonic dress of the waitstaff. Despite what the name implies, you may not customize any aspect of your meal, as individuality is highly frowned upon. One must be subservient to the Build-A-Burger Company's "Comprehensive Food Regimen" or CFR.
Build-A-Burger franchises are considered secondary shrines of pilgrimage (Second to Ground Zero, of course) for adherents to the Ninelevenist religion. They never partake of the food, but rather collect grainy video footage for their "research" library.
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Food
Build-A-Burger prides itself in the quality of its 99.9% pure angus beef patties, flown fresh daily from the altar of the slaughterhouse at Bohemian Grove to all of its 666 locations worldwide. (The remaining 0.1% is a mixture of the equipment's unbaptized baby residue, fluoride, and RFID chip)
In the continuing campaign to pervert all the religions of the world, all hamburgers must be served with bacon and cheese to ensure they are kept inconsistent with kosher and Halal dietary practices.
The signature dish is a double bacon cheeseburger with a cognac special sauce spread between the two patties. When served, the sauce is lit aflame, causing a novel flash from the inside out. The burger is called the Twin Towers.
A seasonal favorite is the "Passion of the Faust", a burger with extra ketchup, lettuce, tomatoes, and a crispy communion wafer. It's served on Fridays during Lent.
Atmosphere
Build-A-Burger is unique in that there is no front counter. Patrons simply sit at a table. The All-Seeing Eye in the center of the ceiling monitors all conversations and as soon as one mentions their food preference, an order is placed in their name.
The inside of the restaurant is decorated with images of pyramids, Stars of David, and a whole variety of Euclidean geometric patterns, signifying Build-A-Burger's true inner knowledge of the cosmos to patrons who might doubt or question Build-A-Burger's supreme authority on Earth. The outside is shaped like a giant pyramid with a burger in place of the eye. This represents "mmm mmm tastyness".
Owlex Jones, the restaurant's mascot, is a 9'11" tall wooden owl that has been featured on children's television, billboards, newspapers, and various media outlets. His world renowned catchphrase is "If you can't get it at Build-A-Burger, then don't eat!". This has received criticism and protests from many developing nations, but these demonstrations were usually shut down within a matter of hours.
Meals are paid on the way out by offering payment to a life-sized handcarved version of the mascot Owlex Jones near the exit. The owl accepts only Federal Reserve Notes through a slit in its beak, resembling a coke machine.
Menu
Main Dishes
- Bali Night Club Sandwich (served extremely hot, usually fried to a crisp)
- Classic Build-A-Burger
- Passion of the Faust (seasonal)
- The Twin Towers
- Unbaptised Baby-back Ribs
Sides
Drinks
- Cremation of Care Colada
- Diet Moxie
- Masonic Moo Milkshake
- Skull and Bones Smoothie
